The Aperture in Between us (A love story) Part 1

I’m in love with a boy. I want to say I am wrong and this is just false love-that I only have a huge crush on him. But no, I do love him. The way he looks, walks and everything more, it matters to me. I hate it when he looks at other people, talks to them as if they deserve it especially to the girls I hate. Why can he talk to them, mingle with them? While I, who had always been clean and nice never had been noticed.

I want to cry so badly. Why? Do I need to be sophisticated or changed just for him to notice someone like me? He knows my name. He knows what I look like. I bet he has taken notice of me but just a little bit of time. But why? Why doesn’t he add me on Facebook or something like at least show something that you know me so I’d be satisfied! I guess you did notice me, but you’ve seen my flaws, misunderstood my ways and thought I was someone you shouldn’t be called. I know your friends, well, they know me. They added me on Facebook-they seem nice. I wish I had fallen in love with them instead for they have taken notice of what and who I really am.

It’s like you are so far. I can’t even imagine myself being with you so why would I think you’d like me? A lot from your class are pretty. I know one who seems to be your type and heard rumours that she and you have a thing. I felt sad but kept it as a secret deep inside and acted like a girl interested but actually fun to be talking about you all through the day.

My friend likes you-a lot of them do actually. But I believe among all them, I am the girl who loves you the most. Not because of time, because of what I feel. I know these emotions that are lingering inside of me are true and sufficient that I am able to determine that I love you.

I’m sorry. I insult you every day so people won’t find it obvious that I like you. You are actually pretty handsome and your skin colour doesn’t determine who you are as a person. Actually, you look good with it. Listen, I want you to know that once you hear someone saying I’m insulting you, please don’t get mad at me and try to misunderstand who I am. I don’t want people to know the truth. I’d rather look up at the second floor where you are, even just a glimpse of you than trying to run after you even though I know I am losing. I’m fine, really.

You love someone else. And I love you. How many times did I say that? I’m not tired though, I’ll never be. It is saddening but I still accept. I’m fine, I’m fine. I hope she loves you too even though some people say you are a jerk sometimes and somewhat misunderstood by people. You have attractive points, don’t get me wrong.

You are famous. It is indeed hard to reach you. I stalk you but I’m not that obsessed. I’m waiting for the time you’d add me or something that is why I check your posts and your friends because maybe, I’m just here, waiting and hoping for something to happen even though it is far from reality. Your followers, likes and many more from the different social media around amazes me. It really is hard being such an attractive dude. That is why I fell in love with you.

I love you. I’m flustered with so much vibe when I say that. It could have been much better if it was in real life, like a movie scene or something but too bad, I can’t and I will never. It is just too impossible for someone like me and someone like you to end up together. This is all a fairy tale but I am not the main character.

 

 

For once,

Really, I desire something

And crave for an exciting story to blossom

Not that I want it to be me and him

Can it be though?

This doesn’t make sense

But the first letters in the first five lines do

It is the name of the guy I am probably in love